I had originally intended on posting my blog on Monday, but was at a loss for words after trying to digest the horrible tragedy that took place in Las Vegas. Although my mind is still clouded by sadness, angst, and confusion, I feel better prepared to share my thoughts. Upon hearing the news, I was of course sad, but somewhat numb to it, because it seems as though the world today is in constant competition for the worst tragedy of the day. It’s all over the news; a hurricane here, a rape there, amber alerts blowing up my phone, bombings, shootings, killings.
I remember my parents watching the news when I was a kid and having nightmares from overhearing or catching a glimpse of the reality of the world. I would go to sleep terrified, not of the “boogie man,” but because I was scared of being kidnapped and taken away from my parents in the middle of the night. I recall my mom coming into my room, to find me curled up in a ball under the covers sweating because I was so scared. I slept with my parents for months until they convinced me that there was nothing to be afraid of. So, I grew up believing that the majority of people in this world are good, kind, loving, and respectful. I can still hear my dad saying, “Kill people with kindness.” I remember being tested by mean girls and bullies, but my dad always reminded that you never know what other people are going through. And yet again, my morals and beliefs are being challenged by the horrific events on Sunday evening.
Monday became increasingly difficult upon discovering that one of my regular students from Soho Yoga, Sandy Casey died in the shooting. She was such a sweet soul who always came to my classes with a big smile on her face with her yoga buddy, Michele Adams by her side. I don’t recall a time when they didn’t come to class together. I was always impressed by her eagerness to practice bright and early for my 6:00am Fuse Flow class before heading off to work in Manhattan Beach as a special education teacher. Every time I teach, I will think of her.
Last night I attended the candlelit vigil in honor of Sandy Casey and records technician of the Manhattan Beach PD, Rachael Parker. It moved me to tears to see the outpour of support from my local community. No matter how sad, angry, shocked, or hopeless I may feel right now, I know that everything is temporary. So in spite of Sunday’s act of terror, I choose to believe that there is more good in this world because as if I can do better, so can the rest of this world. With that, I encourage you to find light in this darkness by loving harder than ever and treating those around you with kindness and respect.
Hi, I'm Lauren and I am here to support people to find freedom in being authentic and the power to carry that out in their lives and community. Writing is one way I like to explore that for myself. Here is my archive of reflections.